A man went to his lawyer and said, “I would like to make a will, but I don’t know exactly how to go about it.” “No problem”, said the lawyer, “leave it all to me.” The man looked somewhat upset and said, “Well, I knew
When a lawyer tells his clients he has a sliding fee schedule what he means is that after he bills you it’s financially hard to get back on your feet.
Client: I’ll give you Rs.5000 if you do the worrying for me. Lawyer: Fine. Now where is the Rs.5000? Client: That is your first worry.
A lawyer was walking down the street and saw an auto accident. He rushed over, started handing out business cards, and said, “I saw the whole thing. I’ll take either side.”
When a person assists a criminal in breaking the law before the criminal gets arrested, we call him an accomplice. When a person assists a criminal in breaking the law after the criminal gets arrested, we call him a defense lawyer.
A noted criminal defense lawyer was making his closing argument for his client accused of murder, although the body of the victim had never been found. The lawyer dramatically turned to the courtroom’s clock and, pointing to it, announced, “Ladies and gentlemen of the jury,
A lawyer was on vacation in a small farming town. While walking through the streets, a car was involved in an accident. As expected a large crowd gathered. Going by instinct, the lawyer was eager to get to the injured, but he couldn’t get near
A defendant was asked if he wanted a bench trial or a jury trial. “Jury trial,” the defendant replied. “Do you understand the difference?” asked the judge. “Sure,” replied the defendant. “That’s where twelve ignorant people decide my fate instead of one.”
“The prosecutor says she can produce five witnesses who saw you running from the bank with the money bags,” a defense lawyer confided to a suspect. “That’s nothing, said the suspect. “I can produce 15 witnesses from my group who where with me at the
A lawyer, engineer and surgeon were debating theology. Specifically, what profession did God belong to? 1) The surgeon: “Eve was created when God took a rib out of Adam. This is the first recorded surgical procedure”. 2) The engineer: