How did the Settlement in the Divorce Proceeding went? My wife’s Lawyer got the apartment and my Lawyer got two Cars
Q: What’s the definition of mixed emotions? A: Watching your attorney drive over a cliff in your new Ferrari.
Q: How many judges does it take to change a light bulb? A: Just one; he holds it still and the whole world revolves around him, but two lawyers have to explain him how to do it.
Lawyer (to Intoxicated Client) : “How high are you?” Client: “No Sir, it’s “Hi, How are you?
Did you hear that the Duracell bunny was arrested? Yaah ! He was charged with battery.
Q: What’s the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer? A: One’s a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
Why Lawyers are safe from the threat of automation taking over their professions. Because No one would build a robot to do nothing.
Lawyer: Killing someone will get you a Death Sentence. Client: Oh! So Killing is like consulting you.
Q.What Happens When a Lawyer starts hard work.. A. Increase in bills without any results.
Q. what do we call a person who assists a criminal in breaking the law after the criminal gets arrested ? A. we call him a defense lawyer.